The obstinacy of the will
Sometimes the drive to begin something is just utterly lacking. Dread overcomes me, and I want to find anything else to do than the thing that I must do. Thinking about doing the task consumes me, even though actually beginning is the one thing that would fix it. Ambition is so easy to the mind, but then the details just overwhelm, and then I get bogged down in all the things I have begun to do. Story of my life, really.
However, I did finish the production of Aristophanes’ Frogs. Finally, Clinton (the sound guy) and I got together and meshed my pristine, carefully-stored video (VHS!) with his audio source, and he melded it together into a DVD. We got 25 copies burned just in time for UMBC’s reunion with my professors in Ancient Studies and other students and supporters, and so I was, nearly 7 years later, able to give the gift of a memory to several of them who were retiring. 6 years, those tapes sat in my possession. But I finally got off my ass and did it.
Now I just need to do that for my current students. They deserve a teacher who can execute and get them feedback in days, not weeks. I must be better.